Spin-off TV series don’t work (unless it’s Frasier, but that’s the one spin-off that does work and it’s the only one that’s ever trotted out as proof). Think: Joey, K9 and Company, Catwoman…

But now exciting news from Britain: Postman Pat’s lovable cat, Jess, is going to star in his own TV show. The deal, reported to be worth several tins of kit-e-kat and a new scratching post, has been signed, sealed and delivered and its only a matter of time before the new ‘educational’ (yawn, yawn) series hits the screens.

Jess: “meeeow”

Asked about Jess’ new contract, Pat mumbled something incomprehensible before revealing that his own script, featuring Jess’ trip to the vet to be neutered, had been turned down by the BBC. “The cbbc bosses are a bunch of silly arses,” said Pat. “This is what being a cat is all about in real life.”
Pat also revealed that his professional relationship with Jess is now over after the cat wouldn’t return his calls asking whether he’d get a walk-on part in the new show. “I couldn’t give a toss,” said an angry Pat. “I wish I’d run that backstabbing feline over, like in the song.”

Meanwhile Jess says he’s excited about the new show. “Meeeeow,” he said before going back to licking his nethers.